I want to talk about the myths that guide our lives.

Do you know what myth shapes the unfolding of your own life?

If not, it’s worth considering. This, after all, is the driving question that propelled Carl Jung into the world of depth psychology.

“I did not know I was living a myth or what sort of myth was ordering my life without my knowledge. I simply had to know what unconscious or preconscious myth was forming me. From what rhizome or root did I spring. I took it upon myself to get to know my myth and regarded this as the task of tasks.”

This task, carried out over the course of his life, led to a substantial body of work that was deeply meaningful to his own personal and relational development, and also profoundly significant in the way psychology has understood consciousness.

I would like to make the argument that this task is relevant to us today if we want to step out of personal lives bound by anxiety, dread, and hopelessness. It is also a question worth considering toward the goal of discovering creative solutions to the complex problems of our world.

But first we should discuss myth.

What is it?

When I begin talking about myth with clients the most common response I get is “you mean, like the old Greek gods?” Yeah, kind of like the old Greek gods. But more than that too.

My favorite definition of myth is this idea of “emergent truth.” It’s the notion that human beings are creatures of storytelling and meaning making - it’s literally how our brains work. Myth then is the inside story of the world we live in. By that I mean mythic stories and wisdom tales are the narratives that have guided and shaped culture, connection, and meaning making throughout the ages. They are concerned, at their core, with what it means to be human.

Therefore, when we approach story with openness, curiosity, and honesty, we can learn to allow story to speak to us about the larger picture of the human journey. This is particularly relevant when we find ourselves seeking guidance, permission, or understanding in our own narrative. It’s about the perspective shift of zooming out and seeing more broadly.

Thus, mythic imagination involves tapping into the creative plane of perspective taking in ways that can allow us to better understand our position in life and quiet the anxieties of our particular circumstances.

But what mythic theme are you in?

The Hero’s Journey

Enter Joseph Campbell. Professor and student of comparative mythology and religion, Campbell compiled as many of the myths he could get his hands on and discerned the through line theme of the Hero’s Journey. It gives meaning to the stages of life, offers a promise that we may be called upon for something greater, and provides a north star for seeking out purpose.

In my work with men, I have discovered that the idea of the hero’s journey is particularly desirable. As a man stymied in the monotonous  trappings of responsibility handed to me by society, I get the appeal of stepping into heroic adventure - more than I would like to admit if I am honest.

So desirable in fact that it is the popular theme in most of our entertainment today. Think of the past 20 years of Marvel characters relentlessly undertaking heroic adventures to save friends, family, and humanity on the big screen. Consider stories like Star Wars, Dune, or even Paw Patrol. They all are centrally focused on the protagonist overcoming seemingly insurmountable obstacles to achieve, win, and liberate. It’s almost as if this is, for many of us, the default myth that directs our imaginations.

But all things upright cast a shadow, and we must also look at the shadow side of this perspective. Is an over inflated focus on heroic victories and noteworthy achievements actually leading us away from the natural gifts and talents housed within our personhood?

Despair

Danish theologian, philosopher and father of existentialism (and the man that undid me in my 20s) Soren Kierkegaard highlights the danger of overly pursuing the wrong story when he said:

“The most common form of despair is not being who you are.”

Read that again.

We are back to the core issue at hand: do you know who you are? Do you know the story that is ordering your life? If not, there is a good chance that you could be suffering from various expressions of despair, anxiety, depression, etc.

An alternative perspective: The Genius Myth

The hero’s journey is but one of many mythic themes. In my own life I find myself regularly coming back to the theme of the genius myth. Where the hero’s journey is about external accomplishments, the genius myth encourages a turn inward and a discovery that leads to deeper senses of self and greater multiplicity of impact.

Michael Meade puts it beautifully when he wrote, “The genius of a person refers to a distinct and distinguishing complex of inner gifts, innate talents and native potentials. It is also a unique style or way of being that characterizes each person from within… Genius also makes us purposeful and meaningful from within.”

This, I believe, was the guiding myth that drew the father of depth psychology into deeper and deeper parts of his own personhood. It was what opened the pathways of creativity and generativity for Jung to discover and share how to become himself in a world bent on achievement and hurling toward destruction. (Remember, Jung began this journey in the anxiety and tension that led to the great world wars - a sentiment that seems to parallel today’s angst.)

Yet, to step out of one myth and into another requires some things that our society does not naturally teach. It requires a shifting of mindset, perspective, and openness. It requires cultivating an internal sensitivity to the stirrings of the heart. It requires the courage to do something unknown. Often, it requires a guide.

Take a step…

As someone who has often felt trapped, stuck, and overwhelmed by the responsibilities and burdens of being a man in this social construct, I have regularly found myself trying to live out myths that are not of me. In an effort to achieve all that is asked of me I have tried on many different narratives.

I have been the lone wolf - fiercely independent, refusing to ask for help, welcoming of my crushing loneliness as my cross to bear.

I have been the soldier - pulling myself up by my bootstraps, over compensating with strength and compartmentalizing my feelings.

I have been the stoic - stifling my feelings with logical rational and dissociative observation.

I have been the hero - traveling to distant lands, pushing my mind and body to unreasonable limits, always in seek of more.

While there is a certain nobility and honor in elements of each of these narratives, none of them served to expand and illuminate the gifts trying to come forth from within me. instead, these narratives only served to move me closer to burnout, isolation, and despair.

It’s not worth it to force ourselves into the wrong story. Because of this, I would encourage you to embark on your own journey of self-discovery and mythic imagination. Find the story written in your bones and you will find the key to setting your soul free.

So take the first step in cultivating your mythic imagination. Grab a journal and consider reflecting on the narratives that have guided your journey. If you feel courageous, share your insights or questions in the comments below. If you're seeking personalized guidance, consider reaching out and leaning into therapy for men.